In many Mayan sources, Chaac is depicted as having a human body which is covered with reptilian scales Chaac and Maize According to this version of myth, Chaac cries to repent for his sins and it is this that causes the rains. Later Chaac committed adultery with his brother’s wife and was punished for it. Together, the two brothers defeated their adoptive parents. One curious myth in the Mayan sources narrates that Chaac was the brother of the Sun. Chaac MythologyĪs the key deity in the Mayan pantheon of rain deities, Chaac was associated with a number of rain myths. The Aztecequivalent of Chaac was Tlaloc who, like Chaac, was tasked with providing rain to the Aztecs and was associated with water. Since Mayans heavily relied on agriculture Mayan mythology and required rain to successfully harvest sufficient amount of food from crops, they considered Chaac a very important deity and attempted to please him through different rituals. And when he struck the clouds with it, it caused rain and thunder. Then you’re on you own because as an up-and-coming billionaire, I don’t hobnob with freeloading peons.Chaac was the name of the Mayan deity who was responsible for bringing rain down on Earth.Īccording to Mayan mythology, Chaac was armed with an axe which he used to strike the clouds. The rest will be taken care of … for one day. All you need to do is buy your own airfare and accommodation. Likely none of these invitees will show, so consider yourself invited as well. I’m allowed 300 invitees to my party, which will include every famous Tom, Dick and Harry, starting with Tom Hanks, Dick van Dyke and Harry Belafonte, plus a bevy of mononymous celebrities such as Oprah, Shakira and Questlove. The evening will peak with a fireworks display over the Caribbean. I’m torn between Bruno Mars, if only for his “Billionaire” hit song, and Weird Al Yankovic because musical parody is the highest form of art. Past acts have included Pit Bull, Meghan Trainor, Maroon 5 and Diana Ross. I’ll start with a top-notch DJ – not that guy who plays his Bar Mitzvah iTunes playlist but some serious wick-a-wick-a-wah so that I can display my dance moves from “Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo.” Then a performance by a famous artist. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve worn a dress as a statement, though some would say it’s less a statement and more a question.īeing a fantastic dancer, I’ll need some top-notch entertainment. A billionaire must arrive to the party in style, so the Billionaire’s Birthday Package includes a dress custom designed by renowned Mexican designer Pineda Covalin, who incorporates the art and cultural elements of indigenous Mexico. “Gimme a pint of Toblerone with a Skittles chaser, please.”Īs the sun dips, the main event will start. I mean a bar fully stocked with candy! As in: I’m not talking a single Hershey’s bar of 60% cacao dark chocolate. But if mixed drinks aren’t your cup of tea, the Billionaire’s Birthday Party offers a candy bar. He’s got the bamboo umbrellas and everything. To wet the whistle, master mixologist Moisés Sierra Sáenz will concoct some fancy cocktails, and even mocktails for the younguns. I bet Chef Shutte could make those little cocktail wieners with grape jelly. My guests will experience a taste of that lifestyle when I have Chef Sidney Schutte of Grand Velas’ signature Cocina de Autor restaurant cater the party with some fancy grub. Why? Because billionaires can afford to eat the fanciest food. Little known fact: All billionaires are gourmands. I call that giving back.Īll that flyboarding and self-importance really builds an appetite. Vainglorious perhaps, but also an educational depiction of Mexico’s ancient heritage. I choose a sand version of me as the Mayan god of rain and fertility Chac and my mesmerizing partner, Mayahuel, goddess of tequila, riding upon the winged serpent Kukulcan. My billionaire friends and I will be flyboarding in the Caribbean while sand artists create a personalized sculpture on the shore. Thankfully Grand Velas has diversions in spades. I will need to be entertained to exhaustion or I may throw an entitlement fit. The spa’s Gold Treatment should work out all the tension my presidency has caused. Post-breakfast, my crew and I will take over Grand Velas’ spa, which luxury-travel adviser Virtuoso named the Best Spa in the World in 2010. As my first presidential act, I’ll shore up relations with Mexico by vetoing every decision not involving a shot of the national drink, tequila. The stay comes with an in-suite breakfast for my ten closest friends, which of course are other billionaires, whom I’ll refer to as my presidential cabinet. Though I’m decidedly anti-politics, a three-night stay in Grand Velas’ two-bedroom Presidential Suite will trump my convictions.
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